gagal lagi

gagal lagi.
mungkin kifarah pada dosa2 lalu.mungkin kenyataan pada apa yg di ungkap dulu.mungkin realiti pada yg diidam kalbubenar kata- kata itu satu doadan benar benar menjadi nyata.maafaku pernah tersilap katadulu pandangan aku berbedadulu aku tidak serupamasa mengubah segalanya  harap masa mengubah nasib ku juameneguh cinta kitadengan kehadiran nya.

wifey material

i thought i am happy with my life now . 
yes i am until today,
 he got all the bullet point. yes he is right may be always right.
 but in the end of the day it just me. 
i m not good wifey material.
 i give all the best i can. but never great enough i guess.   sooner or later he might be bored or sick with my attitude. 
yeah he will eventually. he already does. 
i cant change much i tend to forgot. 
sometimes i just spoke without think n later i regret. 
ya, i clumsy like dat. i cut my hand, i tear my leg, i burn my arm. thats me. 
i ll never change. 
but a long the way marriage life made me realize i m repeating other mistake that i swear last time i will not ever do. 

 i guess it just the life cycle. same as butterfly. from caterpillar ( ugly ) at first later become beautiful butterfly. but i still can't see the beauty part of it. hope that in the end will be great. but now i didn't for seen that. 

i lost everything now even my self & my freedom. when he say i didn't respect him. that tore my heart apart.  this is like my alarm bell.

 i can't think straight now. i am in between life n death.
 i do love him a lot. & he my world now. 
but they say we can't love people so much. it will hurt us.'
so i pay my price now. 
i m really broken. 

compromise

22 days of happiness.

people keep asking me how my  marriage life going on?

erm

i m doing fine, with little adjustment here & there.

opps

we re doing fine.

i do comprised this time.

a lot.